As you've probably noticed, I list a bunch of my favorite blogs in the right-hand column--you should definitely check them all out(!).  I try to keep it fresh, so I delete blogs that seem inactive (i.e., haven't posted in 2012).

I'm grateful to my fellow bloggers, who always have something interesting to say, keep me on my toes, and comment thoughtfully on BW.  I don't know if these folks know how religiously I read them, but I do(!).  And I wanted to highlight some of my favorite posts from the past couple of months:

• Mainely Butch writes about the things she loves most about being visibly butch...  and the things she finds the most awkward.  My experiences are a little different from hers (though there's certainly some overlap), and I loved reading her lists.
• Butch on Tap gives lots of advice for staying sane through a breakup.  I think all of it is terrific, except for the part about avoiding Ben & Jerry's, which seems to me a little rash.
• Butchtastic Kyle writes a terrifically interesting account of coming out to his parents (sort of accidentally) in high school.
  
• Neutrois Nonsense shares advice about things to do before, during, and after top surgery.  (No, I have no interest in getting top surgery, but a friend of mine is planning on it.)  She said it was super helpful, so I thought you all might like it, too.  (It can also help you help a friend.)
• Bren of Diffuse 5 writes a great post on breast-binding for beginners.  I prefer not to wear anything more binding than a nice sturdy sports bra, but if you want to experiment with something more, this is a must-read.
• Can I Help You Sir sometimes posts these great catch-all "links and whatnot" entries.  They always contain interesting stuff, and this latest one is no exception.
• DapperQ, always a fun read, has this great post that illustrates some basic how-tos, like tying a bow tie, with amusing old-timey pictures.
• mx.punk has this interesting, thoughtful post on "Internet pansexuals," and takes issue with the statement, "Love shouldn't be based on something as trivial as gender."

What else have you been reading online lately? 

It's been a full week since I've written a Butch Wonders entry.  Often when I have something I have to (or want to) write and I haven't really been doing it, my brain does this (click to see a bigger version):

I'm learning to write a little faster and get stuff out there immediately.  This is the "prototype early and often" principle (in design thinking parlance), or the "fail, fail again, fail better" principle (in Samuel Beckett / Zadie Smith parlance), or the "brain crack" principle (in Ze Frank parlance).

...Anyone else ever experience anything like the flow chart above?

Recently it feels like people have been writing with more and more questions about me and my blog.  I thought I'd answer a few of them today as best I can.  Here are some that I've received from readers over the past couple of months:

Q: Why did you start BW?
A: I didn't think there were enough websites out there for women like me: lesbians toward the masculine end of the spectrum.  I was unsure what to wear, what etiquette was like in certain situations, and whether other people were interested in the same kinds of discussions around identity that I am.

Q: How many hits do you get every day?
A: It varies.  In the last month, my highest has been just over 3000 and my lowest has been 1000.  On days I post something decent, 1500 or so.

Q: How does the traffic you get compare to other lesbian blogs?
A: I have no idea.

Q: Who's your staff?
A: My "staff??"  It's just me, sitting in my living room with my dog and a cup of coffee, typing into cyberspace and hoping someone will read it.

Q: Do you make a lot of money writing Butch Wonders?
A: I've spent about $700 on site costs over the last year.  And through the Butch Store and selling occasional ads, I've made maybe $300 total.  So, still in the hole.  I never envisioned this as a business, though, so that's okay (though it would rock to get paid for doing something I love so much!).

Q: Why do you keep the blog anonymous?
A: This has been a hard decision.  The short answer is: my job.  My supervisor told me my chances for advancement could be harmed by this kind of outside writing.  So I'm on the DL (as BW, not as a lesbian!) because I think I can do more good by advancing in my career first and coming out as BW second.  But I struggle with this.  Plus, I'd love to make videos for you, and right now, all I can do is appear on the radio (which, I hope, is happening again soon--stay tuned). 

Q: So does anyone know that you write this?
A: Yep.  Mainly family members and close friends.  A few professional contacts.  And one or two folks who wanted me to write for them and needed to verify that I'm really the thirty-something dyke I claim to be (I am, though arguably more nerdy than sometimes represented here).  ;)

Q: Is it true that you used to be married to a guy? 
A: Yes.  You can read about it in several entries.  Check out my Index of Topics, under "Married to a Man."

Q: Aren't you limiting yourself by writing this for butches rather than for all lesbians?
A: Sure.  But a lot of the issues I'm interested in apply mostly to masculine-of-center women.  I didn't want to write about suits and ties and then claim to be a "lesbian" blog, since plenty of lesbians aren't the tie-wearing type.

Q: Do you have a girlfriend?  Is she butch or femme?
A: I do!  I refer to her as my DGF (dear girlfriend) on the blog.  She identifies as neither butch nor femme, and mostly eschews labels (I really want her to write a post about this sometime).  I suspect that most people consider her butch or soft butch, and that many people in the community would consider us a butch-butch couple (so do I, most of the time).

Q: Why don't you write a column for Curve?
A: I pitched it to them, but they never got back to me.  I followed up: still no response.  So at the moment, I'm not a columnist for anyone.  Need a columnist?  Email me!

Q: Where do you live?
A: I'm going to stick with the whole anonymity thing and not say.  But I will say that I'm in a rural area that's very close to a large urban area.  I think this provides a nice balance for me, though it does mean that I burn more gas than I'd prefer to.

Okay, dear readers--that will do for now.  Got any other questions for me?

These may not be as patently silly as May's search terms were, but it still amazes me what people can search for to reach Butch Wonders.  Here are some of my favorites from this month:

• "top 10 butch chick names"  (Flopsy, Mopsy, Cottontail, Mittens, Pammi, Tammi, Kitti, Kiki, Candi, and Lulu.)
• "how to be more butch" (Change your name to one of the above.)

• "my butch will not have sex until after marriage."  (I just hope you don't live in Arkansas or something.  That could be a loooong wait.)
• "i have a crush on my friend angie who is a lesbian shes 30 im 62"  (The specificity of this search is what gets me.  Did this person expect to find a website that was like: "Hey, if your name's Angie and you're 62, you've got to read this?")
• "straight women attracted to butch women"  (Butch women hot.  Straight women not so straight.)
• "are rachel maddow and susan still together"  (Rachel hasn't called to ask me out yet, so I'm assuming so.)
  
• "lesbian bloogs"  (Are ooften gooood tooo loooook at.)
• "want to do it all syndrome"  (If this is a real thing, I totally have it.)
• "why does ellen only wear pants?"  (What is this person watching??  Disappointingly, in everything I've seen, Ellen is wearing a shirt, too.)
• "wonders of the world very very very very very very very very wonderful than all wonders of the world"  (Butch wonders very very very very very very wonderful indeed.)
• "my daughter is beautiful and is attracted to butchish women"  (Yay!  Lucky you!  You get the best of both worlds: a true gentleman for your daughter, and a daughter-in-law for yourself.)
• "lesbian thank you for smelling good"  (You're welcome.)
• "how many dogs have the name butch"  (3667.)
• "i want a faux hawk but im a girl"  (Sorry.  Your sex presents an  insurmountable obstacle to the haircut you want.)
  
• "dont date temperamental men"  (Good idea.)
• "does it mean your gay if you have a fohawk"  (Yup.)
• "why are people butch lesbians"  (Because sometimes hairstylists accidentally give straight women fauxhawks and it turns us into butch lesbians.  Sadly, it's irreversible.)
• "wear only suit vest"  (Bad advice.  I suggest pants as well.)
  
• "Do straight guys hug a gay guy as friends?"  (No.  As I've covered in the past, this turns you gay.  A straight women can hug a lesbian without becoming a lesbian...  but if the lesbian she hugs is butch, they will probably become at least a little bit gay.)
• "how to tell if your butch"  Look at the palms of your hands.  If you are butch, there will be either a green crescent or a purple star immediately below one or both of your index fingers.
  

Great news, dear readers: I've finished the outline of the Pride Project site, and I've been putting up the fabulous pics you've started sending in! 

So far, I have five cities up, and I'm hoping they'll give you a taste of the awesomeness to come: 

• Chicago
• Nashville
  
• Vienna
• Boston
• Oklahoma City

I'm excited about the project, and hope you are, too!  More soon--I'll keep you updated.

I have about 80 readers signed up so far, and the more the better!  Send me a quick email if you might be interested.  Pics and written descriptions of any of this year's Pride celebrations (including the ones that already have pages up) are welcome.  And as always, so's your feedback.