overall it does not bother me what people call me. I think it's fun depending on how I dress that day and see what I get called the most. :)

It used to be that people would ask what my preference is. Now they just assume male pronouns and I have to tell them that I prefer female pronouns. I really hate that when there is an assumption, it's male.

That said, I'm into BDSM and am more flexible about pronouns when in scene. I like being called boi but it's a female-oriented term for me in the same way butch is.

I also cringe at the they/them thing; the first time I heard someone describing their they/them preference I just kept thinking about dissociative identity disorder.

"It" is also a popular pronoun around here.

Growing up I always got really upset when people "he"d and "sir"red me. I made a conscious decision to stop correcting people when I was about 20, because I was curious and also because I wanted to start presenting more masculinely and knew I was going to have to get used to it. It hurt pretty badly for a while, but now I'm used to it... and unfortunately, I've somehow lost the ability to correct people. The words used to just jump out without thinking; now they stick in my throat.

Also now when strangers "she" me I check whether my chest is showing and get kind of put out. And I roll my eyes when people "sir" me, but I also smile. At the same time, I like the dissonance of being a "she" who looks like this. I'm confus[ed/ing], essentially.

I think I might prefer gender-neutral pronouns (ze/hir, ey/em/eir, or whatever), but no one will use them for me so it's hard to tell. People are way more willing and able to use "they" than any other gender-neutral pronoun, so though I see that you don't like it I can't say I agree.

Jeez, Joz. You've never had someone call you by the wrong pronoun, have you? Or maybe you're one of the people who just doesn't care. I can respect that, but some of us DO care, and it hurts. It's not that hard to avoid pronoun use if you're not sure and don't want to ask.

And BTW that was totes ad homineum to attack me on "never been called a wrong pronoun, probs." Hundreds of times, I have. It doesn't matter to me, is what I'm trying to say. What matters is us queers getting along, first of all, with all us other queers, and then, hopefully thanks to Ellen and Chaz and the like, with the homophobic mainstream that is our voting majority. I just hope that one day, everyone knows someone who is queer, and realizes we aren't trying to sodomize their children. I dunno, this is just kind of my goal, and I don't have a lot of interest in fighting with you guys/gals, hence my apparent disinterest that isn't.