You've probably heard of the "half your age plus seven" rule of age differences in dating. The idea is that you divide your age by two, then add seven; that's the youngest person you're "allowed" to date. It's silly, but functions as a supposed "guide" to "acceptable" age differences. Tons of people reach Butch Wonders by searching for things like "lesbian age differences," "age difference formula gay," and "what's the rule for gay age differences?" I can yammer on for days about how it's silly to have a "formula," how all relationships are unique, and yada yada yada. But at the end of the day, people want an easy answer. So here's your easy answer. In the gay community, we get a bit more leeway. The acceptable age difference for us is wider than it is for straight people, and the difference grows as we age. The age difference formula for same-sex relationships is graphed below. We are in blue; opposite-sex relationships are in red. (I know this doesn't take into account bi-gendered people and many other shades of queer, but that involved parabolas and was just too complicated.) The formula is one-third your age plus ten years. This took extremely difficult, comprehensive, and painstaking research on my part--not to mention, many sleepless nights. Now let's practice. If you're straight and 30, you can date a 22-year-old. If you're gay and 30, a 20-year-old. 48 and straight? A 31-year-old. But 48 and gay? a 26-year-old. Ka-bam! You've got it! So, now you know. There's your formula. One-third your age plus 10. If you deviate from it simply to make yourself "happy," or because you've "fallen in love" or whatever, know that you're contravening science itself.
115 Comments
roses
3/2/2013 05:58:32 am
I totally needed this! Except I go the other way--I date much older. I may or may not have a date next week (is it coffee? Is it a date? Is she gay? you know the kinds of questions) with someone much older than myself. I think I may withhold doing the math, even though I think she might just barely be in the ballpark. Hahahaha
Reply
3/2/2013 07:01:57 am
I will date someone 10 years older than me and nobody below the age of 30. I am 33. that is how i am.
Reply
1/26/2017 01:26:04 pm
i need some advice and also i would like to know, is it bad for a lesbian girl (etc) me) to date a 27 yr old girl and like im only 14
Reply
girlfailure
1/10/2024 11:01:36 am
I'm the same omgosh,,, I have the hugest crushes on older women and unfortunately i'm only 16 my most recent lil crush is 22 and totally not gonna happen lolllll
Reply
ish
3/2/2013 05:59:32 am
Too young for me...
Reply
Suzette
3/2/2013 06:07:03 am
I have a brother five years older & a sister five years younger than I am. I tend to use them as my parameters.
Reply
Emat
11/29/2013 01:55:07 am
Suzette - you really shouldn't be dating your siblings...
Reply
C
2/14/2016 05:34:03 am
LOLOL!!!!
Shawna
3/2/2013 06:31:25 am
I can't do it... My supposed age group for potential dating would be 23. I'm 40. I have an almost 22 year old daughter... My daughter and my date could be BFF's.. LOL.. No thanks!
Reply
3/2/2013 06:40:14 am
Hmm, yeah, maybe there should be a "never date anyone younger than your kid" caveat. Heh, heh...
Reply
roses
3/2/2013 07:24:28 am
Someone dumped me after she saw me and her daughter next to each other and realized I was closer in age to her daughter than to me. But I'm 32 and her daughter was like 23 9/2/2013 01:19:45 am
I'm 49..got a 32yo on the line...well within your parameters. His parents are only 2 yrs older than me. I haven't met them yet but it makes me really nervous to think that I may not be able to handle my emotional response to meeting the parents and seeing MY peers/friends/classmates in them. Recommendations?
Tallon
3/2/2013 06:39:56 am
When I was younger, I dated women much older than me, it wasn't necessarily a preference, it was a necessity, there weren't any out dykes in my age range. In my 20's I was with women within a year or two of my age, when I got into my 30's I began dating women much younger than me, I was talking to a friend about this, and she astutely pointed out, that I've pretty much always dated women in their 20's, lol!
Reply
Nayar
4/5/2017 08:40:18 am
To kill !!
Reply
Catmo
3/2/2013 06:56:36 am
My first real GF was 20 yrs older than me. I had been fascinated by her as a kid. We had a great relationship, for 5 years, but it did finally come down to our ages. I was just starting my life, and she was starting to slow down. She turned 64 this year. We're still good friends. It's harder to look at our age difference now, than it was then.
Reply
Nayar
4/5/2017 08:41:42 am
Dégénérées!!
Reply
Cal
3/2/2013 06:58:53 am
It's the same age for me either way.... Hmm....
Reply
Susan
3/2/2013 07:37:00 am
Usually, age shouldn't matter...I've known totally immature women in their 40s and old souls in their 20s...it's all about if you're comfortable with each other...
Reply
Roxxie
2/20/2015 11:55:44 am
I agree Susan
Reply
Rina
6/22/2016 10:25:21 am
My wife and I are 34 years apart but I think we both act like we're 27 so it works out! :)
Reply
Deetoo
3/2/2013 09:16:28 am
At some point age matters. Not saying love doesn't. But we all are into different things at different stages. The older you get the more obvious those things become. For the short term, sure there can be differences...for the long term, more than 10 years either way...is going to cause some issues....
Reply
ciaran
3/2/2013 10:54:13 am
my wife is 5 years younger than me. One of my girlfriends was quite a bit older. I think it comes down to life stage, there's no hard and fast rule, but if ur ready for kids or retirement you want someone who matches your desired lifestyle, not necessarily age related.
Reply
Josie
3/2/2013 11:23:53 am
Did you make this up.
Reply
Heather Grant
3/2/2013 12:13:13 pm
Now that's plain silly; at 58, I could date someone 29.3?! Sure, if I never took my clothes off, lol.
Reply
Emma Jane
12/27/2013 05:54:45 am
Well I'm 16 and am with a 55 yr old. I think she's gorgeous with her clothes off but I love her personality the most.
Reply
Heara
10/9/2014 10:04:16 am
Girl she is using you for sex bc ur young lol
Ashley
1/26/2015 03:08:37 am
In till this day are you still dating her (:
arrell
2/3/2015 05:32:55 pm
Emma Jane,I say. ..If it works for both of you,Great. Never mind the haters, be happy.
cassie
7/22/2016 07:50:38 am
Well... I'm 16 and I have a 22 yr old girlfriend... I love her with all my heart we have heard hateful things and all kinds of stuff. She thinks she will get into trouble being with me because I'm not 18. Idk what to do.. we are both females and are happy. I don't get why we can't just be together happily.
Aurora
9/18/2016 11:03:23 am
I'm 14 and my girlfriend is almost 18. I love her with all my heart and the age gap has never been a big thing for us.
R
9/8/2020 03:51:19 am
@cassie same here, except im 16 and she just turned 23..idk why its such a big deal, they isnt using us for bad things just because they're older, like they actually care about us
Chris
3/2/2013 12:40:09 pm
I look at it this way: If I'm old enough to be their mother or vice versa, it's not gonna happen. For me that is an 8 year difference (yes 8). Maturity level, life experience, etc all factor in too.
Reply
Pauline
10/15/2016 08:18:32 pm
Thank you. Sentiments shared x
Reply
Rachael
3/2/2013 02:31:43 pm
I'm 42 and my partner is 26.... our ages have nothing to do with our relationship, it's the way our personalities mesh, the respect we have for each other, the trust and honesty in our relationship, etc. Why limit yourself by age? You could be missing out on the best things in life!
Reply
kayla
3/2/2013 03:55:50 pm
touche' my friend!
Reply
C
2/14/2016 05:39:09 am
Exactly : )
Reply
Mike
5/17/2016 04:22:14 pm
I am a 48 year old man and my boyfriend is 20. We mesh well and live each other. Neither could be happier.
Reply
BuddySteve
9/12/2016 03:58:00 am
Live "with" each other? lol
Ashley
11/23/2017 05:26:05 am
Im 42 and my partner is 26 as well.
Reply
kayla
3/2/2013 03:49:34 pm
im 23 and my girl will be 43 soon... ive never met anyone that made me so happy with such little effort....ever! she has a 10 yr old son that still after almost 1 year takes some getting used to because hes halfway grown and not something gradual for me to get used to with his aging process...never dated anyone with a kid) but her personality and mine mesh like no other... my action for adventure matched up with her urge for it and vice versa... not to mention 9for her anyway) 43 means no more playing and cheating games!
Reply
Kayla continues......
3/2/2013 03:54:13 pm
when it comes down to it... im severely attracted to my beautiful girl...and her years just make her that much more experienced and sexy! without a doubt thee obe for me and plan on having a good long life with her and love eternally.
Reply
Wow, I'm so glad that I am married and out of the dating scene. It's nice not to have to worry about social norms and all that. Now, my wife and I are traveling the world and enjoying the "happily ever after" part of life. Oh, and by the way, my wife is 8 years younger than me but since I'm rather immature, it evens itself out. :)
Reply
Molly
3/2/2013 08:50:22 pm
I met my Beautiful Wife when I was 17 and she was 25. . . Our age difference is funny sometimes, we make poor pedo jokes at our own expense :p, and other times it doesn't even matter. It's about the connection that you feel with a person. As I like to quote to all of my friends, (One in particular ;) as he has a sudden interest in men over 35. Him being 21 :D and is slightly distressed at this new revelation ) "Love Knows No Age." and "Don't hinder yourself in such a way that you could potentially miss out on someone wonderfully amazing." :D
Reply
bradley lyle
7/25/2017 08:19:10 am
my mom is54 and she just met a 16 yr old
Reply
VanBlossom
3/2/2013 10:53:02 pm
Age does not matter for us. I'm 31 and my wife is almost 19 years older. The important thing is that we share the same values and humour, but most important we have respect for eachother. Her 'old and experienced friends' never took us serious (while my younger friends did from the beginning) even after we married 5 years ago and became proud mother of twins. We are together for almost 8 years now and never more in love than right now!!! She and your boys are the most wonderful things in the world for me. So you could the best thing if you restrict yourself to a certain age...
Reply
Having just played cupid with a couple of friends who were admiring each other from too great a distance - because 'age' was a factor (55 & 33),
Reply
Donna and I are still off the chart. I was 24 and she was 50. We didn't think it would work because of the age difference so we decided to sleep together to get it out of our system so we could go back to being friends (through political work). That was in 1983!
Reply
K
3/4/2013 12:43:16 am
Awesome! So glad to hear that :-)
Reply
zoe
3/4/2013 10:21:38 am
50/3 +7 = 24 (rounded)
Reply
Joy
10/1/2016 09:54:50 pm
Love this. :-)
Reply
WWG
3/4/2013 12:11:59 pm
Oh my, this formula almost perfectly fits my life right now, or more so, the women who are hitting on me! I'm in my mid-30s and the last three women who've hit on me are all 21 and 22! I usually date mid-30s to mid-40s, so this has been a bit of a shock. But I'm considering each one for who they are and getting to know them and deciding if dating (MUCH) younger is of interest to me.
Reply
Kenny
3/5/2013 12:51:38 pm
Thank you for the permission. Go Cougs!!
Reply
Kim Hall
3/8/2013 02:57:34 pm
Dating younger (48 & 30) for the first time and lovin it!
Reply
JD
4/12/2013 05:00:43 pm
I often date younger women (I'm 44), because I'm into activities (e.g., dancing, live music events) that most women my age aren't, and I have a lot of energy. My current GF (she's 29) is pretty mature and self-directed, and teaches me lots re: life, emotions, music and literature. She says she appreciates that I'm self-possessed and know what I want from life and love--things I attribute to my age. Anyway, it works for us.
Reply
Maya J
3/10/2013 05:48:08 am
Why is the "formula" different for orientations? I think this is total bs either way. Why do people need some method to tell them who it's ok to date? Anyway....I'm almost 30, and most people in their early 20's annoy the sh*t out of me. With the exception of those rare birds, this new generation is a headache. I personally like being with someone who can relate to the things I grew up with. I don't wanna be anybody's teacher.
Reply
Nick
11/19/2013 10:49:35 am
im a gay 15 year old and ive recently met an older gay man who is 31. he really is a gorgeous man and we love each other and havent shared it with anyone. i dont know what to do until im 18 and neither does he. i just dont understand why its so important to date someone your own age. love is love and its just a part of life. i just see him as my soulmate and when the time is right in a couple of years we'll be happy together. any advise would be MUCH appreciated thank you
Reply
Heara
10/28/2014 11:39:51 am
It's not love that's called being a predator,what sicko hits on a 15 yr old?
Reply
jason
1/14/2016 12:34:25 pm
well, just make sure hes 31, it should be ok, sometimes just be careful, he might be like 40 or something, and just be careful that once you get old enough, if hes not in a relation ship, logically, if your older he might hit on another young guy, whos younger....it doesnt make sense he wouldnt be in a relationship at 31 i would be concerned, he doesnt love you i dont think, he just wants a young guy and you dont know your worth till your older.
Reply
James
7/8/2017 04:15:58 pm
I'm in the same boat but think of it this way in another 15 years you'll be 30 and he'll be 46 as time goes on no one will care about the difference and yes you may love him but don't do anything sexual until your 18
Reply
cat
12/22/2013 10:26:16 am
What is a relationship about? common interests, common goals, the ability to laugh together and sexual attraction. If a couple have these and, as long as it is within confines of the law, I do not see issues regarding that age gap. I'm 24 and I've dated women around my age, they seem messy, complicated and immature. I'm now with someone who is 40 and I is the best relationship I've ever been in, every aspect of our relationship is amazing. the sexual chemistry is incredible, we make each other laugh, we like the same food, we have common goals. Sure, I can't remember the 70's/80's and she doesn't know what cartoons I watched as a child but if there is enough common ground, love and respect in a relationship that has a big gap then why shouldn't it work?
Reply
Robert D
4/29/2014 08:53:48 am
I'm 68 and my boyfriend of 2 years is 22. I'm anything but a sugar daddy - he's very intelligent and a computer scientist (well, nearly) who makes his own way - we share house duties as well as cost of living expenses - we are very much in love and plan on getting married in a couple years. We met on a website for younger/older gay men. For reasons that neither of us can fully explain we are emotionally, physically, and intellectually on the same wave length most of the time. He keeps me well informed on everything new in science and technology (indeed this info has helped grow my retirement portfolio in a positive direction) while I help him plan for his own future. I live a very healthy life style in order to be there for him (genetic luck on my side keeps my mom going at 95, and an alcoholic father who made it into his 90's) We laugh a lot and over the last couple years our friends have come to accept our relationship and enjoy being with us whenever possible. I'm happy, he's happy, what more to say.
Reply
Sean
6/21/2016 05:51:44 pm
I really enjoyed reading this thanks. l have met someone that is 18 and im 30. I absolutly hated this at first and tried pushing him away at all costs for a long time. I myself at 30 look like a 21 year old so it was no surprise to me when he a younger guy was hitting on me but for the longest time i just disagreed with it. But the friendship grew and grew and the attraction did as well. To a point when every time he was around i couldnt take my eyes off of him. He was incredibly talented, he was smart, some what funny and even though he hated his smile it made me just melt on the inside. Funny coming from me because i admittedly am a prick and didnt see things in people like i saw in him. furthermore he is built almost the same as me i mean hardly a difference. So one day we finally touched and it was so damn electrifying the connection we had. I had never felt that with anyone and at this point in my life had a few partners and had witnessed so much about relationships. Then the strangest thing started to happen I all the sudden have started feeling like i want to be such a better person for myself and for him. Me being the selfish human being I am, this was huge for me. He is in so many ways is a better human being than I am. And the depth at which I am certain he feels for me is indescribable. Yea i see where science gets its info. I know where people are coming from with it. And usually I would say thats crazy to date that far apart and have said that many times. I think human connection is far more complex than we can ever imagine. And so until he no longer has me I suppose ill have to roll with the punches and keep him around. And the funny part is there is no one in our corner, and maybe thats what makes us stronger. But its my guy and if only i could show the world how he looks at me and how we look at each other I think theyd say something really great. #heartpouredoutfromadullandsoulesshuman.
Reply
Gilbert
4/2/2017 03:08:00 am
I am 63 and my boyfriend is 18. I often question our age difference, but he keeps saying that love has no age barrier. We have been together for 2 years now.
Reply
Eugene
11/17/2021 08:42:15 pm
Wow, you’re a straight up predator.
JohnT
4/20/2017 11:36:44 am
Thanks for your post - wondered if you were still together? I am, like you, a genetically lucky guy and also a younger looking, fit/healthy 53. Last year I met a 22yr old post-grad and the chemistry between us was utterly amazing. Plans had already determined that I would be travelling to the other side of the world, but we had an astonishing summer together. On our final night together I was never so heartbroken, and saying goodbye was almost too much to take. Even with such an age difference I felt absolutely that he is THE one that got away. We kept in touch via skype etc for a few more months but, well, life moved on and our different life circumstances couldn't be resolved. There was, and is, a true deep love between us - age differences can be acute and still the chemistry etc works. I keep dreaming of finding my way back to him haha!
Reply
Erin
5/7/2014 05:13:52 am
I started dating my now-wife when I was 24 and she was 57. Just outside your graph. But now I'm 30 and she's 63, so it works! Ha. She is a year older than my mom but a few months younger than my dad. Her kids are 7-10 years older than me. Most everyone in our life has been supportive, except her a$$ homophobic son, who doesn't count. Yes, we get strange looks and we have been called mother and daughter more times than I can count, but we make it work. She's always been young at heart and up for new adventures. We've gone sky diving and parasailing and zip lining through the jungle. A lot of people assume I'm with her for the money, but actually, she's retired and makes just enough for her half of all the bills. We joke that I'm her sugar baby. Yes, we know it won't always be like this. Her age will start becoming more of a hindrance and she won't be able to move like she used to. We are not blind to the fact that there will be some hard times ahead of us. She has said she will move out before I ever have to take care of her. She's stubborn like that. So we make the most of every day, try to get in a lifetime of adventures and memories in a much shorter span than most couples get. But that's what you have to do when you love someone.
Reply
Lucy
5/6/2015 09:28:31 pm
That's beautiful <3 <3 And your comment encourage me to be with the woman I love.
Reply
Aaaaawwww so sweeeet mama age dosnt matter i tell you im 23 and my wife is 64 she is the air i breathe i quote again "wife" we are married for 2 years and i would never change a day she has been my biggest support ever since i met her when i was 17 wbut i wouldnt give her up for the world so understanding and treats me like a princess we do get stares on the road ppl normally say u never walk without ur nana and we just smile we get mocked by ppl all the times but we dont care she is my life sentence and i told her ill be her es if they ever leave her and whenever she cant move around anymore ill be pushing the wheelchair and she cries :"( i could go on and on but age dosnt have anything to do with love leave age out of it focus on the person
Reply
Hi my name is yolanda an im 44 ill be 45 in October an my mate is 50 she tells me im not ready for her an im self centered i love this lady we been together for almost three yrs she tells me that im to into my self but i don't see it i cater to her but she say if you love sumone it's not all about money i just be wanting to make sure we got that's all so how do i deal with her cause i want to marry her but she alwayz say im not ready so what to do
Reply
deven khalsa
9/28/2014 03:58:12 am
I soo needed all these encouraging comments, because I want to be with a younger woman and my older friends keep trying to dicourage me from it . I needed to hear from other lesbians who are fulfilled in their long term relationship regardless of the age difference, whatever the age difference is.
Reply
hunni go for it thats all i can say ive been with my wife for 6 years altogether. i met her when i was 17 we got married when i was 21 im now 23 and guess her age............ she's 64 we now married for 2 years i cant imagine my life without her....hunni it can work go for it.
Reply
Toni
10/3/2014 01:16:50 am
After 5 years of abstinence, love unexpectedly caught me just as life changing events were taking place. I had become close friends with a subordinate at work. She is a beautiful person who follows her heart and thrives on happiness. I did everything to help further her career with the company and found myself falling in love. The 33 year age difference always made me push my desires back. Then a friend brought to my attention that she (my Holy Grail) was Obviously interested...so I mustered all courage and told her my feelings. I have never been with anyone I feel so comfortable with and though I know that age and others are going to play an important part in our lives...for now, we have a strong sense of one another and love.
Reply
stevie like wonder
10/30/2014 04:50:59 am
Found this useful. I'm in an odd circumstance. A friend who I've been close with 6 years and met through her older brother my age (I'm 24) I've been close with the family since well we lost touch the last year or so and reconnected she's now 18 (0.0 uh oh?) And we've been connecting on a whole another level we knew each other so well and feeling naturally came about and now I'm at this dilemma..am I too old o.o? I can only imagine how her parents felt from tgw transition but as of now are happy and receptive
Reply
peak
3/18/2015 07:08:55 pm
You know what sucks about this situation?
Reply
lana
5/19/2015 12:41:41 am
i am lesbian and dated much older women for years, now my partner she's not married or attached to anyone but me, but she works and i study far, when we can see is mostly at weekends or holidays but its hard to keep our love secret to my family because they are homopohobes also she's older than my mother, our gap is 36
Reply
Isa Walton
6/14/2015 11:29:17 am
I have been a lesbian all my life. I am 63 now, in a very loving, commuted relationship with another woman. I have fallen in love with a straight man who is married. It is sweet and it is painful. He is younger. I will never divulge this to him or anyone else.
Reply
What! how comes u been lesbian all your life been with women all your life and also currently ur in a committed and loving relationship so how comes its so easy for u to fall for a young man at that your 63, lesbian all ur life how u did it so easy? what happened? My wife is 63 she been gay all her life its not easy to just fall inlove with a guy like that but still i dont know the connection between u both....what happened? does ur woman know abt this?
Reply
Sophie
9/9/2015 01:29:34 pm
I fall in love so rarely that there's no point in restricting myself in age (or gender for that matter). As long as it's between two consenting adults, who cares? Definitely don't need a guideline like that.
Reply
Rachel
9/26/2015 06:52:51 pm
My partner is 31 and I'm 22 so I am half her age plus 7.
Reply
Jeff
10/18/2015 02:07:55 pm
47 y.o. guy with a 27 y.o. guy. We've bonded unlike any other (I've been out since I was 25) and I am starting to think he's The One. It would be a shame to throw that all away because I can't get past a 20 year age difference. I've already run it past my 24 y.o. son and he's OK with it as long as Dad is happy.
Reply
Liz
2/3/2016 04:27:33 pm
I'm 15 and I'm looking for love idk what to do anymore I asked a girl out and she said she had a boyfriend
Reply
K&K
2/9/2016 09:52:46 am
I am 23 and a girl I like is 30. 1.5 years ago she moved to another country because of work. Although she had her chance, she never said anything about leaving. When I found out about it I was left heartbroken but didn't want to show it because I was (and still am) supportive of her dreams. If only I knew what was going to happen I would have offered to come along. To this day I'm still missing her but I think that's one way street because she is always super busy and never finds time to initiate contact with me. I guess it's time to move on but I definitely think that our age gap means nothing. All that matters is how much effort you are willing to put into making it work. And also, our example shows that communication is of utmost importance in a romantic relationship.
Reply
Sabrina+ariel
3/25/2016 12:04:05 am
My name is Sabrina I'm a lesbian and I met my girlfriend when I was 14 and and she was 17 now I'm 15 about to be 16 and she is 18 now about to be 19 and my dad wants to call the cops on us because he is saying she is too old for me. Is this true is she too old for ??
Reply
shivanee
6/5/2016 10:31:30 am
hi i am 28 and my hon is 51 and we been together 3 years now but i knew her since i was 15 years old i love her then but then told her when i was 25 years is this wrong
Reply
Eline
9/26/2016 09:19:55 am
I went to an lgbt+ camp last week and there was one gorgeous girl who I started talking to. After a while I found out she was 14, while I am 17, so I told myself not to see her as anything more than friends, but the more I got to know her, the more I wanted to ask her out. According to this she's still too young but I just feel like we'd be so great together. Uggh I'm just gonna stay friends with her and see what happens as we age.
Reply
Deanna
10/31/2016 09:18:00 am
My name is Deanna. I'm 22 and the girl that I love with all of my heart is 15. Most feel as if I'm just using her for the sex when in reality sex has nothing to do with it. The way she makes me feel is unlike anything I've ever experienced before. Since the day we started talking she's made me feel like I'm on top of the world. We share this connection that is amazing. My friends seem to be perfectly okay with the fact that she's seven years younger than me as do most of hers. But there's this ex of hers that seems to constantly try to get in the way of us. Calling me every possible name that you can think of. Making me wonder if this is something I should continue or if I should just let her go and live her life since she's still young. However I don't want to because I love her with everything inside of me. Still to this day I get butterflies every time I'm around her just like the first day we met. I'm just confused and I don't know what to do and it hurts.
Reply
Bella
11/28/2016 03:03:41 pm
If you really love her, and it sounds like you do, wait 3 years til she's 18.
Reply
norita_banana
11/14/2016 04:49:07 pm
im 22 years old and recently met a woman who is 35 years old. SO 14 year age difference.
Reply
Rachel
11/28/2016 03:05:52 pm
I'm 19 and by any standard rule that means I can date a 16 year old, but that still feels icky. I know 3 years isn't a big gap but something about being on opposite sides of 18 wigs me out. I'd be fine dating a 25 year old but I wouldn't date a 17 year old. Does that make sense?
Reply
Nicholas
4/8/2017 11:52:38 am
Twenty year difference. We've been together almost two years. It can be done, especially when your maturity levels meet somewhere in the middle.
Reply
Emma
6/21/2017 12:37:34 pm
I am a 33 year old lesbian who lives in the UK. Almost a year ago I started talking online to a 16 year old girl from America. I didn't know her age when we first started to talk as we were both a part of an online RP group. We spoke together all the time and I admit when I first found out her age, I was concerned. Straight away I checked the legalities of this for where she lives and found it to be 16 +, so no problems there. We official became a couple a while later, now she is 17 and I planned to go out to America to visit her next year, after she turns 18. The age gap doesn't bother me or her at all. It's the people around us that have a problem with it. My best friend knows about the relationship and thinks that I should end it because it's not right. My girlfriend also doesn't want to tell her mum my real age as she thinks she won't accept it, but I have said I can't visit her unless her mum knows the truth. (She still lives at home with her mum)
Reply
Jess
7/11/2017 11:13:29 pm
I just turned 30 and my girlfriend just graduated highschool. She is 19 and she was 18 when we met. I was with a men for 14 years, married and had 5 kids. I met her when I joined roller derby and it was love at first sight. She had never been in a relationship before and it took a bit of convincing on my part but now almost a year after she said yes we couldn't be happier. I love her with all my heart and couldn't ask for anything more.
Reply
Confused Jane
9/11/2017 05:36:24 am
I am reading this now because I met a lady who is 19y.o. and I'm 33. lol omg never happened to me before. I am freaking out! My nieces and nephews are older than her.
Reply
Jess
9/11/2017 06:34:12 pm
It isn't bad. My girlfriend will be 20 in November I'm 30 and we just celebrated 1 year of dating last month. I love her with all my heart. My oldest son is closer in age to her then I am but we make it work.
Reply
Mickey
9/11/2017 10:34:12 pm
A few years ago I met a woman online. I was in a 17 year relationship /marriage to a woman of my age. She worked for a hospice and constantly talked about our end and death. We also had stopped being sexual for about the last 10 years. So the woman I met seemed to be in her 30's. Surprise! She was 19 and I was 51. Itried to end it but our attraction to one another was intense. I divorced my wife and it was ugly. I call myself an accidental cougar. Now a few years in I am happier than any other time in my life. I have always wanted to run away in my camper for 6 months and because she is young she doesn't have the hangup about getting rid of stuff and being free. I never feel judged by her. She gets my attitude towards life and my desire to be away from society. I am a woman carpenter and have spent my career around men and she says "lets do it, you deserve the chance to dream". I know someday I will be too old for her so we have agreed to 10 years then reassess the situation. I am feeling free and happy agsin.
Reply
Firered
9/12/2017 12:46:58 pm
What the hell are rules made for except to be broken? I'm a guy, 18, and I fell in love with a 27-year-old guy. We'd actually be breaking so many taboos with this. Religion, homosexuality, even the supposed age gap limit within the LGBT community. I love him though, and I wouldn't want to change a thing about him or about us. And as far as I know, love is love ❤
Reply
Tim
12/28/2017 01:36:11 am
I am a fit 58 year old and have met this 29 year old Asian man. The more I talk to him the more I realize it is more than physical. I have never been in a gay relationship before. I want to escalate our friendship. The age thing worries me. Can such a large gap work.
Reply
Amber
1/31/2018 03:17:10 pm
I am 17, I only date older women because my mindset and maturity level is up there. I'm currently talking to a 25 year old. is she or I in the wrong ?
Reply
So many relationships around us suffer because of the awkwardness of an age gap. What could’ve been something beautiful, end up as mere fantasies in people’s heads simply because they don’t talk about it fearing the awkwardness that would follow. That must never be the case. Age is just number. We should not judge a person by there age height weight. Sometimes a person younger to us might be more matured or a person who is elder to us might not be that matured vise versa.
Reply
Jose
4/27/2018 10:07:01 am
I'm 36 my boyfriend is 16 I can't explain what happened because of my moral is a no but when I was going true a bad moment in life I found him and he was so mature and understanding we where friends and he remind me of me at the age I never hang out with younger always older person de Me we both gay and I want to know if that OK. People see it wrong but things happen for a reason his my all today
Reply
Miguel
11/17/2021 08:50:09 pm
Glad you’re aware of your reprehensible morals. You’re a predator for dating a minor, what is wrong with you?! Get help. And stay away from children.
Reply
Tammy
1/20/2019 05:32:05 pm
I'm 22 a lesbian I've recently started speakin to this 15 year old also lesbian we had an instant connection hit it off straight away she makes me laugh so much n just makes me so happy we are also extremely similar she's also fairly mature for her age! We haven't met yet we started speakin on social media the messages got intense pretty quickly long phone calls she just makes me feel alive! I am planning to meet her when she turns 16 n I will be 23 she's my world! But I'm a little worried wat people will think especially comin from the older one any advice would be appreciated it but I do Love her so much I know I do I seem to feel all her emotions get butterflies always makin me smile n laugh I feel she's someone I've been waiting for :)
Reply
brina
1/29/2019 12:07:28 am
im 22, soon to be 23. my girlfriend is 15. we live in different states at this time, i plan on moving where she lives within the next year. i love her a lot and she means so much to me and the other way around. but idk if thats to big of an age gap?
Reply
Melissa
4/22/2020 11:40:35 pm
My wife of ten years is 21 years older than me,we met when I was 23.I’m 34 now,she’s 55 and has no sex drive to speak of since menopause.She went from wearing a strap-on under her jeans for 18 years to cringing when couples kiss in public,she LOATHES the mere mention of anything sexual.For the first time in our relationship I’m regretting/resenting our age gap,physical intimacy is very important to me,she won’t seek any form of treatment,natural or otherwise.I love her very deeply and I know she would beside herself if we weren’t together but she’s not trying,i want a divorce but I don’t have the heart to say it.
Reply
Steven
3/21/2022 09:45:18 pm
I am a sixty year old bisexual male who has slept with only five men. .and is attracted to men ten to twenty years his senior .age should not matter as long as the couple love each other .hopefully I could get married or find a. Husband in the future.I know I would make a good wife
Reply
Jax
8/24/2022 12:21:12 pm
I was 28 nonbinary afab when I met a 19 year old who showed interest in me. Through taking and long Text base conversations I too started to develop feelings for her but I have that fear of judgement if I were to pursue a relationship with her. Is that age difference okay or should I back away?
Reply
Ilya
1/5/2023 03:59:25 pm
I’m 18 and he turned 26 today. Is the age difference okay?
Reply
Your comment will be posted after it is approved.
Leave a Reply. |
|