A few weeks ago I wrote this article recounting my pseudo-gender-conforming job search. Shortly thereafter, a butch superstar six or seven years ahead of me in my field reached out about the article, and we ended up having coffee and chatting about her experiences. Not only was she even more awesome than I’d hoped, but she had interesting theories about butch clothing selection that are way too interesting not to share.
Said superstar proposed the following:
The bottom line is that Superstar says to go for a men's suit next time—at least, it worked for her. So maybe I will. Or maybe I'll go back and forth, since I like both men's and women's suits that are relatively gender-neutral in appearance (e.g., no cutesy buttons for women's suits, no mega-structured shoulders for men's suits). But I do like wearing ties, which tend to look better with men's suits. Superstar had no major opinion on ties, since she doesn't wear them herself, but since they are THE quintessential "men's" professional clothing item, maybe a tie would be more likely to be looked on unfavorably by prospective hirers.
What do you think about Superstar’s theories? Let's unscientifically test one of them! Click here to take a SUPER-quick 2-question quiz. I'll post the results this weekend.
6/11/2014 08:36:31 pm
I don't think I'm alone when I say I wear mens clothes for protection. As a child growing up I was forced to have sex five different times by guys who thought they could change me. I started rebelling against my mother and the dresses she made me wear. I'd come home from school with a ruined dress until she bought me jeans and t-shirts. I cut my hair just so she had to take me to get it "fixed." The more I looked like a boy the less interest boys took in me. I knew i liked girl's before any guys forced me and let me tell ya I've never felt more gay in my life. If a man looks at me with interest of the sexual nature, I am sure he must be bi or gay bc i get sirred more than most men...and it makes me feel gay. With a woman, i feel straight. I feel whole. I don't feel like a queer. It's all natural for me. I don't claim either gender. I am born female. I have more male hormones than female in 60% of my body. 55% unnoticed by the human eye 5% facial/body hair. Yes, of course I shave my face, underarms and legs...and my unmentionables, but if i let my facial hair grow it's the perfect goatee and women love it...so do men....so yeah, protection.
Even though I am in the over 50 category, I say wear either man-tailored with no feminine embellishments, or men's clothing - as long as it looks good on you (it needs to fit and drape properly) and you need to be comfortable in it. Either way they are going to know you are butch, and that will have an effect that you have no control over.
7/21/2014 10:41:40 am
I'm almost 60 and have spent the past 35 years trying to conform to what the corporate environment dictated women should wear. I have gone from dresses and heels to women's 'pant suits', to.........well what ever I thought would make me feel comfortable. I finally have transitioned over the past couple of years to wearing men's clothing, and finally feel like me! I don't feel 'manly', I just feel more comfortable and confident. I do get some looks at work from some, but I just smile and move on.
9/28/2022 09:12:50 am
Thanks for thiss
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