GAY MARRIAGE! oh wait... MARRIAGE!

One of my readers just shared this image from NYC Pride, and it seemed too jubilant not to share immediately.

As you all know, the Supreme Court decided a little under a week ago that all states must issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.  I was really moved by the decision, which was more inclusive than I expected it to be, and it's been so interesting watching people's responses to it.  I learned about it when my partner woke me and said, "Hey!  We can get married anywhere now.  The Supreme Court legalized gay marriage."  I'm butch enough to admit that this brought tears to my eyes.  

Though there's plenty to say about the decision itself, what it does and doesn't do, and what this means for the future of LGBTQ people in America and beyond, today I just wanted to share a collection of responses I've gathered from LGBTQ Americans in response to the decision.  Some are from social media, some from face-to-face conversations.  But I thought the breadth of them might interest my beloved BW readers.

I don't want to get married but I am so stunned to finally have full civil rights that I'm still a little 'high.' When I came out 50 years ago, being gay was loathsome and illegal. I'm grateful for all the organizations that put in the work to create a culture change.

I really didn't imagine this would happen in my time. I cannot even imagine how all the seniors must feel. It saddens me to know that so many never got to freely love whom they wished. They're the real heroes.

I was way more emotional about it than I thought I would be. I just kept thinking that I finally wouldn't have to worry about whether or not I would be able to see my wife in the hospital or whether or not we could adopt each others' kids. Then I thought that it was kinda messed up that I was so happy that it was finally legal for me to have a family.

It was a joy, indescribable... To see years of activism, its fruition, and then to see many who have been dreaming, hoping, and thinking the day would never arrive within their lifetime, folks in their 60's, even 70's. That made those countless marching in the suffocating heat, sleepless nights planning , organizing... Someday, when I meet the right one, my soulmate, I can get on my knee, with the certainty that wherever I am, we can plan our wedding, our marriage... not just a bunch of legalities and notarized paperwork...

Told my sister I am so excited about the Supreme Court decision and she asked 'Which one?'  I felt like I was going to vomit, or like I was suddenly about two feet tall.

I felt so proud that we as a community helped make their dream, and mine come true by standing our collective ground telling this country... we have rights.  We're not asking for privilege; we're demanding rights [that are] rightfully ours. And this time, they listened.

My parents didn't seem to get what a big deal it was.  I told them and they were just like, yeah, okay.  I was like, how am I supposed to be close to people who can't realize how monumental this is. 

I took care of a friend the last year of her life.  She was 88. She told me stories. Terrible what she had to go through. She was kicked out of nursing school for a note she had written. The home she and her partner bought together was taken from her when her partner died. She was shunned from the family business, because she refused to marry. She's been gone 17 yrs now. She would be very happy.

It is a big victory, to be sure.  But it makes me sad that as an LGBT movement, marriage is what we have chosen to focus on.  We used to be radicals. Now we are excited to be just like everyone else?

I'm happy about the decision, but now my mom and stepdad will be on me more than ever to get married and have kids like my siblings, and that is not the life I necessarily want!  I love my partner and maybe will marry her eventually, but I am just a different kind of person and don't want the same life.  The marriage decision doesn't prevent me from feeling less valid in their eyes.

The decision was all about couples, couples, couples.  What about the fact that in a lot of states, we can still be fired for being gay?

Married to my wife in FL and loving every second... I am 48 and never thought I'd be this happy!

Marriage... is a washed out concept in my opinion. Having the same rights is what is important.

This isn't, and never really was, about gay people being able to marry.  Its about telling our young lgbt people that they are finally accepted and respected.  It's about choice and it truly is a wonderful time to be gay and out.

I was struck with emotion I didn't expect. My partner of 14 years and I probably won't get married... but to feel "equal" or even a part of the "norm,"is something of unexpected joy. To have that choice is amazing.

This means everything to me, as my wife and I are expecting our first baby in December. We are in California (married 2 years ago yesterday). Her entire family is in Texas, so whenever we've visited Texas since we've been married, I've reminded myself "we're not actually married when we're here." Because of the Supreme Court decision, we can travel to Texas with our child and be recognized as a family just as we are in California, and our child will never live in a world where their moms' marriage only exists in some states.

I'm still getting all teary-eyed thinking about all this...  I mean, I know we have a LONG way to go before we have achieved true equality across-the-board... but still, this is so much farther than I ever dreamed we would get when 30 yrs ago this-here spikey-haired dykey 19-yr-old gave a ring to my then-girlfriend, and wished like hell that such a thing as marrying her was even possible.

So there you have it, dear readers--a sampling of the breadth of the LGBTQ response to the ruling.  Thanks to everyone who wrote to me with their thoughts.  I hope that regardless of your take on it, you're getting a chance to bask in this victory a little, in whatever way is meaningful to you.