What Should Your Dyke Daughter Wear to Your Wedding?

Here's a question I received recently from someone who's wondering what to do with her butch bridesmaid daughter.  Never fear...  here's the Q&A: 

Hi, I've been a single mom of two beautiful girls, one straight and one gay.  I'm getting married in May but I have no idea what to have my butch daughter wear.  I want her to be absolutely comfortable, so I don't expect her to wear a dress.  My theme is soft pastels and romantic lace, etc.  I am wearing a lace dress, the bridesmaids are wearing chiffon pastels, and the men are wearing gray.  I am so stuck.  Please help.  We are on a budget.  Thanks!!

Dear Single Mom of Two Beautiful Girls, One Straight and One Gay,

It's really terrific that you're interested in making your butch daughter feel comfortable.  This is a big deal, and you're going to be most comfortable on your wedding day knowing that everyone else is comfortable, too.  I'm guessing your butch daughter isn't all about the "chiffon pastels," is she?

First, have you asked your daughter what she would like to wear?  She might have some terrific ideas.  The simplest thing would be to have her wear the same thing the guys are wearing, if she's comfortable with that.  But I'm kind of assuming from your question that you don't want her to simply wear what the guys are wearing--is that right? 

Options abound, in any case.  Here are three, assuming you want her to look different from the groomsmen:

1. Gray pants (the same color as the groomsmen's) with a shirt the color of the bridesmaids' dresses.

2. Gray pants, a white button-up shirt of her choosing, and a tie and/or vest the same color as the bridesmaids' dresses.

3. Whatever the groomsmen are wearing, but with a suit vest instead of the jacket.

I hope this helps!  Have a terrific wedding, let me know if you have any questions, and please keep me updated on what you decide.

Love,
BW