First, let's get three things out of the way.  (1) I voted for President Obama, and expect to do so again; (2) It is awesome that, for the first time in US history, a sitting president has announced his support for gay marriage; (3) This may be an important step toward building a national consensus.

Still, I felt more annoyed than excited about the President's announcement today.  Some sources have portrayed this as an "edgy" or potentially divisive move (as has Obama himself).  The President also stated: "I had hesitated on gay marriage in part because I thought civil unions would be sufficient, that that was something that would give people hospital visitation rights and other elements that we take for granted..."  As if, after wrestling with the facts, he has finally evolved into a supporter.

I say: bullshit.  Like any self-respecting Constitutional law professor and civil rights advocate, Obama supported gay marriage before he became a presidential candidate.  Then, once he decided to run, he eschewed these privately-held beliefs.  Not coincidentally, the polls at that time showed that a majority of Americans opposed same-sex marriage, too.  More recently, the political balance tipped, and a majority of Americans now support same-sex marriage.  Then--voila--after testing the waters with VP Biden's announcement yesterday, President Obama suddenly comes out supporting same-sex marriage, too? 

The President's open support of same-sex marriage is wonderful, but let's be honest: if most Americans had supported gay marriage in 2008, he would have supported it back then.  And if public support hadn't grown, he wouldn't have come out in favor of it now. President Obama is, foremost, a politician.  If we pretend that we're that much more to him than another issue, another constituency, another factor in the political calculus, we're kidding ourselves.

In my last post, I showed y'all the teal toenails I'm currently rocking.  I posted on the BW Facebook site, "I'm so butch that I can paint my toenails without threatening my butchness."  I asked readers to complete the sentence, I'm so butch that _______.  Here are some of their responses:

• I'm so butch that I open the door for gay men.
  
• I'm so butch that jumping 10 feet in the air after seeing a mouse and screaming like a girly girl then cursing like a sailor doesn't bother me at all. Still butch!
• I'm so butch that when someone calls me "sir," I enjoy making eye contact and embarrassing them on the spot!
• I'm so butch that when I go the doctor, they don't ask me I've ever been pregnant or if I'm pregnant now.
• I'm so butch that when I was 15 I wished my gorgeous 40-year-old neighbor would leave her husband and be with me instead.
• I'm so butch that I'm confident enough to get a mani/pedi every couple of months.
• I'm so butch that even my mom shops for me in the men's department!
• I'm so butch I can wear a Giorgio Armani suit better than a man.
• I'm so butch that I let my girlfriend kill the spiders while I run shrieking. Still butch.
• I'm so butch that I do not have to paint my toenails.
• I'm so butch that I fail to understand the tendency for butches to cry or coo at cute kitties and puppies.
• I'm so butch that I would rather use a shovel and muscle instead of a rototiller!
• I'm so butch that my fruit flies have banished me from wearing dresses and growing out my hair because I look like a straight guy trying to be a drag queen. 
• I'm so butch that I can cry when I feel the need.
• I'm so butch that I like the men's room one and I say "thank you" when people call me sir.
• I'm so butch that Leslie Feinberg asks me where I buy my clothes!
• I'm so butch that I might curl my eyelashes and flash 'em at the girls, but when wearing an A-shirt I still get called "buddy" by strangers. That's just how I choose to rock it.
• I'm so butch I sent my daughter to my sister's house to learn how to apply makeup.
• I'm so butch that I go shopping with my straight male friend and hold his stuff and sit on benches while I count the minutes until it's time to go home. The salespeople think we are a gay male couple
• I'm so butch that I wear boxers and tank tops.
• I'm so butch that I would punch someone in the nose if they asked, "Do you have a boyfriend?"
• I'm so butch that I can sneak into a mens restroom without so much as a glance.
• I'm so butch that almost every time I get into a women's bathroom line, men start lining up behind me like, yup this must be the line if he's in it!
• I'm so butch that I still open the doors for the ladies wherever I may be--you don't see many males doing that any more.
• I'm so butch that my fiancee laughs when I run out of boxer briefs and have to resort to wearing women's undies!
• I'm so butch that I can rock pink and yellow better than some femmes!
• I'm so butch that I can say I love decorating.
• I'm so butch that my daughter buys me dress shirts and ties.
• I'm so butch that I was walking the walk before I even knew how to talk the talk.

I love seeing how different readers define butch.  How would YOU finish the sentence, I'm so butch that ____?

Being butch shouldn't stop you from doing something you want to just because it's "girly" and people might laugh.  These are my toenails right now!  And I'm not alone, either! 

Earlier this year, A Femme in NYC wrote How to Know if a Femme Likes You.  I've been wanting to write a butch counterpart to her excellent list. 

Many butches are shy.  I'm one of them.  Sure, some butches will march right up to you, tell you you're hot, and ask you out.  Not me.  And not most butches I know.  Faced with a hot femme (or butch--God, hitting on another butch brings up a whole host of other issues...), our confidence sometimes melts, a cocky grin turning into a tentative smile.

If the butch object of your affection is one of the shyer members of our species, her hints will be subtle.  These clues apply to butches interested in anyone--femmes, androgynous folks, other butches, or anyone else:

15 Signs That a Butch Might Be Into You 

1. She happens to have awesome suggestions about where to go to find your favorite kind of cuisine.
2. When you mention some place you're interested in, she looks interested and/or says, "Oh yeah...  I've been meaning to check that out."
3. She tells you, "We should hang out sometime."  (She won't actually ASK you out unless you say something positive in response, like, "Yeah, that'd be cool.")
4. She finds some thin excuse to get your email address or phone number.  For instance, she'll really want to talk to you about that plumber you recommended, or she wants to email you the name of some random book she thinks you'll like.
5. She invites you to a group outing.  This may seem counterintuitive, since what she really wants is some one-on-one time, but this way she doesn't seem like she just wants to get into your pants (and she saves face, since if you don't return her interest, she can pretend it was just a friend thing).
   
6. In a group setting, she sits right next to you.
7. In a group setting, she sits as far away as possible, then glances your way sometimes even when you're not speaking.
8. She blushes or gets an "aw, shucks" look on her face when you compliment her.
9. She insists on paying (possibly signalling that it's a date).
   
10. She lets you pay (with the caveat that she'll pay next time, which means that she wants there to be a next time, thus giving her a ready excuse to ask you out again).  
11. She tells you that you smell nice.
12. She either talks too much or stays super quiet.
13. She gives you those patented butch puppy-dog eyes (hint to butches: this doesn't work on other butches especially well; they're onto you). 
    
14. She'll do little tiny protective things, like walking on the outside of the sidewalk, opening your door, or offering you her umbrella.  (See, in our effort not to look like sleazeballs, we may be over-gentlemanly, like a 1950s college boy, but with better hair.)
    
15. She offers to do "butchly" things for you: fix your computer, check your tire pressure, or install your new garbage disposal.
    

Got it??

OMG, as I finish up this entry (and I'm totally not kidding), there are a butch and femme tentatively flirting at the coffee shop I'm sitting in.  The femme just grabbed the butch's hand to emphasize something, and the butch held it back, just for a second, and blushed.  Telltale sign.  Then the butch was all like, "Oooh, you should come check out this community garden we have, six of us will be there tonight having a few beers, yada yada yada," and the femme was like, "I totally will."  Well played, ladies. 

So what do you think of this list?  What are some of our other "butch tells?"

At the end of each month, I kind of look forward to checking out the list of odd search terms that brought people to BW.  Among my favorites for April:

• "why does everyone want to be with a butch woman" (Because we're all super hot.)
• "are chukka boots gay" (Only the ones that pair up with other chukka boots.)
  
• "calvin klein" "they have the" "the tie"  ("That is a" "good point."  "Indeed, they probably" "have several" "ties.")
• "what happens at the end of the pet milk story by stuart dybek" (The story is literally three pages long.  Read it yourself.)
• "do butches ever put dresses on"  (Yeah.  Wanna see?)
• "butch females & fems having sex videos" (Videos of butches and femmes having sex?  Or butches and femmes who own sex videos?  So confusing.)
• "what do butch lesbians wear to the beach" (This stuff.)
• "san francisco lesbians tube" (More on these mysterious lesbian tubes... Will this ever stop?)
• "sanfrancisco lesbians tube" (I mean, seriously, people!)
• "s.f. dyketube" (Sigh.)
• "my girlfriend says shes at a friends" (Liar!)
• "lesbian tubes" (Aaack!)
• "why does rachel maddow dress like a man" (Can somebody else please field this one?  Just looking at it makes me tired.)
• "butch females are annoying"  (But not as annoying as ignorance.)
• "how to encourage a gay hitting on a straight guy" (I'd try something like, "Yo, stop it.  That dude's straight.")
• "val" "long distance relationship" (If your significant other's name is "Val," I'd say your search may be a little too specific.)
• "my girlfriend wants an open faced panini sex style
  (Um.  What?)
• "men wearing timberlad boot sock fetish" (What's a weirder fetish, Timberland socks or open-faced paninis?  I say it's a toss-up)
• "men hugging each other" (The world's mildest fetish)
• "how to get a butchs attention" (Throw a chukka boot at her.)
• "best way to be butc" (First step: master the spellchec functio.)
• "girls tie guys up and put makeup on them" (Well, yes.  But only for Cinco de Mayo.)
• "gay man in Splint"  (An unlikely scenario.  Gay people's bones are made of titanium and are exceedingly durable.)
• "does forest green shirt and blue undershirt match?" (No.)
• "can you wear dress vest unbuttoned" (Yes, unless it's a formal setting and you're wearing a jacket.)
• "can you wear cufflinks without a suit" (Yes.)
• "can you wear a black shirt under a white button up" (Yes, but you definitely shouldn't.)
• "butch women turn me on" (Well, as we established above, they are super hot, so that's to be expected.)
• "why are lesbians crazy" (Because people keep hiding our lesbian tubes.)
• "what does it mean when man embraces women" (It means he wants an open faced panini sex style.)

Stay tuned for the next thrilling entry.  What'll it be?  Lesbians in Alaska?  A tale of underground dyke communities in far-flung regions of the world?  A list of ways butches screw up relationships?  These are just a few of the great guest post ideas that your fellow readers are cooking up.  I have a feeling you're going to like this feature...

That's a wrap for today.  Be well, butches!